Ten days and I’ll reach two…

October 3, 2007

It’s quite exciting. Days had gone so fast, then, weeks, months, and years. I can still remember when I was still in my mom’s womb. I was trying to avoid some sort of pills that might have caused me to lose my life in there. Truly, my mother attempted to abort me. But, I never gave up. I resisted. I didn’t want to die. I wanted to see the flowers bloom and the butterflies that surround them. I wanted to hear the chirping of the birds and the rush of the ocean. I wanted to see the view of the land and feel its coarse texture. I wanted to touch the cold breeze. I wanted to smell the scent of those ripe fruits hanging upon a tree. I wanted to see how the sun rises and know why it sets. I wanted to see the soft glare of the moon. I wanted to explore the world.

If I had died, I would have not known the beauty of God’s masterpiece. If I had died, I would have not felt the warmth of what they call love. If I had died, I would have not been able to express how I feel and how lucky I am to have felt them. I can do all of it because I am alive. And, I thank Him for that. I thank Him for not letting me be overcame by death. I thank Him for letting me see the wonders of His creation. I thank Him for my life.

Now, I have lived for 19 years and counting. I’ve seen enough and the sight made me want to have died back then. It’s unfortunate to see things I never expected it to be when I was just as small as a bottle. It’s disappointing when all I wanted to see was beauty, yet I have seen it stained with blood and remorse. It’s sad when all I wanted to see were green trees and beautiful mountains, yet I have seen quite a few. It’s discouraging when all I wanted to breathe was fresh air, yet I have breathed dusts and smoke. But, who’s to blame? Man has been given intellect and wisdom. He uses them to live. He uses them to gain power. He uses them to conquer.

In the next ten days, I will reach 20. It will be my 20th year of witnessing the world in progress and its ruin at the same time. What more could it become? A new door will open for me. New reponsibilities. New worries. New problems.

And I will still be thanking Him for letting me face my nightmares and allowing me to wake up and stand firm again.

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3 Responses to “Ten days and I’ll reach two…”

  1. lex22 said

    this is brilliant. i can relate myself to your idea because i was also an unwanted baby. i thank you for writing this. i’ll give you the highest rate.haha. this is one of your bests. happy birthday!!! i hope you’ll find your purpose in this world. don’t despair and hope that you should have died back then. seeing how other people destroy the world should not discourage you to live and enjoy life. rather, take it as a challenge. make a difference and make our world a better place to live in. God did not allow you to die for good reasons. He knows that you could be of great importance to the world He created. He wanted someone to help Him restore the beauty of our world.

  2. nevergirl said

    You make me feel ancient. Linked you up, by the way!

  3. nickname said

    Don’t you worry chin, you still look gorgeous. Thanks for the link. 😀

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